dostluk ile ilgili ingilizce bir makale
The only way to have a friend is to be one.
Ralph Waldo Emerson
We all want to have true friends, but the quality of our friends depend on us. If you want to have true friends, you should be a true friend yourself. By being a true friend, people will love to be around you and many of them will eventually become your true friends.
In addition, being a true friend is a good way to solve relationship problems. Its difficult to change other people, but you can always change yourself. You can then solve the otherwise unsolved problems in relationships.
True friend Here Id like to share 17 tips to become a true friend. It may take years to learn to apply them but they are essential to boost your relationships.
Here they are:
1. Befriend yourself
Friendship with oneself is all important, because without it one cannot be friends with anyone else in the world.
This is an essential first step if you are to be a true friend. If you dont even accept yourself, how can you accept others? You may have made mistakes in the past that you cant forget. But forgive yourself for them. You perhaps dont have the traits you want in life. But accept yourself as you are.
2. Accept others
A friend is someone who understands your past, believes in your future, and accepts you just the way you are.
After you befriend yourself, you will be in a good position to accept others. Other people may do you wrong or have some bad habits you dont like. But you are not perfect yourself so there is no reason for you not to accept them.
3. Make time
At the end of your life, you will never regret not having passed one more test, not winning one more verdict or not closing one more deal. You will regret time not spent with a husband, a friend, a child, or a parent.
Sometimes we are too busy to provide time for relationships, even for important people in our life. That most likely happens because we put relationships too low in our priority list. If we regard relationships as high priority, time wont be a problem. We will make time for relationships.
4. Be a good listener
Friends are those rare people who ask how we are and then wait to hear the answer.
The art of listening is one of the most difficult arts to master. I experience it myself. Sometimes I talk with a friend but dont carefully listen to what he says. Sometimes Im introduced to a new person but dont carefully listen to her name. A true friend doesnt do that. A true friend is a good listener.
5. Enrich others life
Friendship is a treasured gift, and every time I talk with you I feel as if Im getting richer and richer.
A true friend provides value to others. She wants people who meets her to be enriched in their life. If you want to do that, you should live a lifestyle of value. This way you amass value in your life you can then distribute to others.
6. Understand first
Everyone looks at life through his own lens. Often we expect others to see life through the same lens as ours, but that will create a lot of problems. A true friend is someone who is willing to look through other peoples lenses first. He tries to understand why they think and act that way.
One thing I find helpful for this is learning about personality. Learning about personality helps me understand why people behave differently from me in certain situations. A good, easy-to-digest book on this subject is Personality Plus.
7. Find common ground
Finding common ground helps you connect with new friends quickly. The common ground allows you to talk to others about something they are interested in and thereby build relationships with them.
To make it easier to find common ground, you should enlarge your ground. The larger your ground, the easier it is for you to connect with others. Two simple ways to enlarge your ground is reading a lot and listening a lot.
8. Be interested
If you want to be interesting you should first be interested. Be curious. Cultivate interest about many things. If you do that, you can genuinely be enthusiastic when people talk to you about something. People will feel appreciated and love to be around you.
9. Take initiative to help
Make use of your friends by being of use to them.